To poop in the potty...

Trying to potty train is  one of the more frustrating experiences as a parent. When Ethan reached the age we wanted to start potty training, I conquered it the way I always do: I read a bunch of books.

Everything I read, said that you should make it fun, no pressure, reward for the small things. Well, this hasn't worked. After potty training two boys, I feel like an expert. An expert at knowing that nothing works.

None of the books are right. All I know is that kid will stop pissing and shitting in diapers when they feel like it - not when you want them too. I know that some parents will say that isn't true - my kid responded easily to stickers on a chart, or just putting them in underwear, or letting them run naked, or giving them candy as a reward, etc. But, I will argue that you just tapped into the idea that your kid was ready - that or you have really easy kids.

None of mine were that easy. Ethan never was into the micro-managing of potty training. We tried. He refused. When he was about 2.5, Ethan really wanted this $70 Cranky the Crane (Thomas the Train) play set. Kevin told him if he started using the big boy potty and went a week without needing a diaper or having an accident, Kevin would buy it for him. That week Ethan was potty trained and never looked back. Yes, Kevin had to order the $70 toy, but in our minds, that was $70 well spent.

Now, Emmett has always been head strong and stubborn. About the same age, we tried the same trick. That didn't work. We tried the stickers and the candy. No luck. We tried letting him go naked or pee outside (he liked that), but it didn't translate to no diapers. At the age of 3.5, I thought we would be an adult still in diapers, but one day he just said to me that he would like some underwear and to be a big boy - I think that Ellis was about to be born played a role. That was it. Seriously, no bribery needed.

Here we are with Ellis. He turned three in September. We have a potty seat in the bathroom, which Ellis will sit on before baths and pee in there (but no other time). Ellis finally has enough language skills to communicate his needs, so we figure time for potty training. Low pressure should work, right? Nope. He will tell you he is stinky, bring you a diaper and wipes to be changed, but he won't go in the potty. I always tell him he is a big boy and should go in the big boy potty, but he just tells me, "no way."

We went and bought him some cool Cars underwear and put them on him - telling him he has to go in the potty. That lasted one hour before he had soiled all three pairs. I am tired of paying for diapers, and I know he will eventually decide the toilet is great, but until then I am not sure I can survive.

The idea of all three boys using a toilet and no diapers just seems like a dream come true -- until I go into the bathroom and see their definition of using the toilet.